A Day in the Life of Ron the Rat & other stories
by Safire
Summary: A collection of humorous, and perhaps touching, short stories where the HP characters are animals. Dedicated to Vyse...I tried my best. P Please leave a comment!
1. A Day in the Life of Ron the Rat

**A Day in the Life of Ron the Rat**

A sliver of afternoon light managed to squeeze its way through a small crack in the brick wall.  There wasn't much space in this alley, but it was enough for a rat.  It was enough for Ron the Rat.

It was a particularly breezy day, one that most rats would want to spend capering in open fields where encountering danger was less common than finding a full slice of cheese.  Yet this copper-colored rat with scraggly fur had just woken up from a lazy slumber.  He had dreamt the most wonderful dream, the kind that sticks in your mind for weeks on end.  He was on his way to the junkyard for the largest, most luxurious meal he would ever have, complete with leftover Thanksgiving dinners and full milk cartons just a day passed the expiration date.  It was a world without vicious pigeons, hungry mutts, and tricky rat poisons.  As far as Ron was concerned, those were the only true evils in the world.

But it was just a dream, dammit.  Ron still had to find a way to deal with those problems.  People didn't want him around.  In their mind, he would always be the disease-infested creature that horror movies are made of.  He would have to battle unjust prejudice against rodents like him.  It didn't matter how often he bathed in a puddle of rain or how many times he resisted biting some lame human in the leg; society would never let Ron the Rat live in peace.

Rather discouraged, Ron set off into the crowded city for another day of rummaging and scurrying.  His schedule was always busy, as there was always more rummaging and scurrying that needed to be done.

His tiny legs pumping frantically, Ron the Rat dashed between the feet of all types of people.  He saw everything from fancy dragon hide boots, clearly the most fashionable at the moment, to grungy trainers that desperately, though silently, begged to be thrown away.  And even though Ron made this journey a million times, he always found himself fascinated with the variety of the Mundus Magnus--the Bigger World.

As Ron scrambled up hastily over yet another trash pile--run, leap, and land!--the Mundus Magnus began to reveal itself like a rising sun over the cardboard boxes and corroding scrap metal.  It was a glorious sight, being able to experience what is often no more than a childhood fairy tale for other less fortunate rats.  Ron knew he should be grateful.  He was able to see the bright city lights that received anyone without question; the open sky, painted a pale, mystical blue at times and a fiery, passionate orange at others.  He was able to smell the sweet scents from the bakeries and the intriguing aromas from the bistros.  In the store windows, Ron caught a glimpse of shiny glass pieces of different shapes arranged on a checkered board; he couldn't help wonder what they could possibly be.  From the edge of the roads, he heard laughter and chatter, but Ron didn't think of them as "humans."  They were simply friends, family, souls.

Ron decided that the world wasn't all bad.  There might be pigeons and mutts and poisons lurking around every corner, but if he never took the chance to roam outside his usual alley, think of what fiery canvases and captivating scents he would miss.  Forget the terrible world out there for a second and you might just be able to realize what beauty there is.

So Ron the Rat continued.  He stepped off the trash pile and ran into the city.  The sun had finally completed its journey toward the South, so the sky was a magnificent display of midnight blue.  It would be a couple more hours before the stray cats and garbage trucks would find their way back to threaten innocent rodents.  Ron refused to return to his alley-haven any earlier.

By Safire

(September 2003)


	2. Draco the Amazing Bouncing Ferret

**Draco**** the Amazing Bouncing Ferret**

No one really expected this of Draco Malfoy, sometimes known as the no-nonsense true heir of Slytherin. He wasn't the type who concerned himself with trivial matters like emotions and other matters that would make girls squeal and giggle. "Awwwww! How cute!"

Draco Malfoy didn't care about cute.

All he cared about was his reputation, which basically came down to two things: Quidditch and mocking Gryffindors, his favorite targets being none other than Harry Potter and his troubled twosome Weasley and Granger. That was why Draco always spent any free time he could scrounge up practicing Quidditch and figuring out new ways to embarrass those Gryffindors. It was his means to a glorious end.

Then people started to wonder...so why is it that we can never find Draco on Friday nights? Where does he disappear to every week? He's certainly not out on the Quidditch field perfecting his Seeker skills. And he isn't being a prat, following Harry around with his two human boulders. And why, when his Slytherin dorm mates discover him on Saturday morning, is Draco always in such a good mood?

People would speculate, mostly the less-than-proper girls who did their best to carry out their dream of some relationship whatsoever with Draco. Others would say Draco was secretly spending extra time with Professor Snape, the formidable Potions master, in order to sharpen his skills before the N.E.W.T.s and surpass all his classmates. 

But no one knew for sure. Yet if someone had ever been clever enough to follow Draco in the shadows or with the help of a little magic, he would have figured it out. Every Friday night, as everyone else was rushing down to the Great Hall for a relaxing supper, Draco would take a sharp turn and sweep down to an empty dungeon, the furthest possible from the stone stairwell. Draco had unimaginable talent that far surpassed anything the professors were allowed to teach a sixth year. If someone had followed Draco, he would have seen a shocking thing.

A furry white ferret.

Draco Malfoy--the arrogant, smirking bully who never took any crap from anyone--spent his Friday nights as a ferret, much like the one he had been involuntarily turned into by a pseudo Mad-Eye Moody in his fourth year. Except now it was completely voluntary.

In his white ferret form, Draco would scurry about in circles, lightheartedly chasing his bushy tail, the simple pleasure never dying down. After a while, though, the room would start spinning obnoxiously, so he would have to make himself stop. Then Draco would flop over lively and lay on his white, furry back, his stubby white legs pointing lazily towards the stone ceiling of the dungeon. On some occasions, Draco would conjure up a brightly-colored ball before transforming into a ferret so that he could entertain himself for hours chasing the elusive bugger.

One particular Friday, as Draco was scurrying around the perimeter of the dungeon, he heard footsteps from the hall. As they grew louder, he also began to hear whispers, faint and attempting to remain undiscovered. Draco held a similar desire. Draco dashed about, hoping there would be some form of hiding place. Unfortunately, empty dungeons don't make for a good hiding place.

Suddenly, the hefty wooden door to the dungeon creaked open. At first, Draco saw nothing. But as the door closed again, the heads of Harry Potter, Hermione Granger, and Ron Weasley melted into sight, a silvery fabric falling to the ground. Draco poked his furry, white head out from the shadowed corner. Hermione was the first to catch sight of the creature.

"Awwwww!! How adorable! Harry, look! It's a ferret!"

Ron, however, spoke up first, talking with mischief in his voice as he approached the shadowed corner. "You know what, Harry? This little bugger reminds me of Malfoy. You know, when Crouch blasted him. Let's see if he bounces as well as Malfoy did!" Draco glared at Ron as he grinned stupidly.

Harry was the last to walk up to the little ferret. With his emerald green eyes, he peered down at Draco's beady black eyes. Harry smiled too, but it wasn't the same as Ron's. Draco saw something genuine in it, something heartfelt. Harry bent down and scooped up the small ferret, and surprisingly, Draco didn't try to bite his hand. He didn't even flinch or try to run. Harry placed Draco up in his arms, letting the little, furry paws place against his chest. Draco, almost without realizing it, allowed himself to chirp a little. Harry smiled again and nuzzled the head of the ferret, all the while never saying a word.

The moment was over way too soon. Hermione, thinking she heard more footsteps outside the dungeon, urged them to get back under the Invisibility Cloak and leave, so Harry knelt back down to gently return the ferret to the ground. As soon as his paws touched the unforgiving stone floor, Draco already missed the warmth of Harry's arms and even more so, the warmth of his smile. Draco watched sadly as Harry rushed out of the room, once again hidden from view. It was a unique experience, one that Draco would end up hoping for deep inside of him from then on. But it never happened again. After a while, Draco stopped his secret excursions down to the dungeons; he didn't want his deepest hope to be shattered anymore.

Yet if anyone ever asked Draco what his favorite experience at Hogwarts was, that would've been his answer: the time Harry picked me up with complete tenderness and held me close. There was no competition, hate, or jealousy between us. Draco treasured the memory, and it definitely marked the peak of his time at Hogwarts. He just figured he would have to change a few details.

by Safire

(September 2003)


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